Chapter 44: Don’t Let it Get to You

I was still awake when Thomas came back from helping Gabby with her environmental studies paper.

I’d been watching a lame science fiction movie on TV, when Thomas tried to slip in quietly.

“Hey, how did it go?” I asked immediately.

“Good. Really good. I mean, it’s all kind of weird to me. This is the girl who’d never give me the time of day. And we sat on her sofa and I don’t know. I wanted to make a move, I felt like I should but I don’t know. Maybe I’m wrong. I mean, I’m not good with girls and stuff.” Thomas glanced down at his feet, shoving his glasses back up on his nose. “I don’t think I’d know if she wanted me to make a move let alone how to make one.”

“First, you should ask her out on a date. I mean, I know there’s nothing much to do around here, but I’m sure you could find something just ask her out. What’s the worse that can happen?” I shrugged.

“She could say no! And then she could tell her friends, who could tell their friends and the whole school will know!” Thomas answered.

“I doubt it. Come on, we came in and she seemed pretty into you, I mean she kissed you right?” I suggested.

Thomas nodded. “I don’t know, I’ll think about it.”

“Well, I think you should go for it.” I suggested.

I stood up and took my empty coke can into the kitchen, shaking out the remaining drops of sofa and placing it in the recycling bin.

Thomas leaned against the wall. “I didn’t see Olivia all night. I figured you’d be asking first thing.”

I shrugged. “I think we’re effectively over. I thought if I could apologize and get her to listen to me, she might forgive me, but it looks like that’s not going to happen. I fucked up, and it’s over.”

Thomas frowned. “But you really like her, and she really liked you

I nodded. “Yeah, but I don’t think I can fix this.”

“So, what are you going to do?” Thomas frowned.

I sighed. “I don’t know I’ve been thinking about just packing up and getting the fuck out of here. I mean, without Olivia, there’s really no point in being here. I can get a job on my own, I can support myself I’m sure there are a million other high schools I can go to or at the very worst, I could get a job and work on the high school diploma some time later” I sighed. “I don’t know. All I know is that without Olivia, there’s really no point in me being here. I mean, I can’t stop thinking about her, having to see her every day is going to be hell.”

Thomas frowned, looking like a puppy that had it’s favorite toy taken away. “You would really consider leaving?”

I nodded. “Yeah, I’m starting to think it might just be easier on everyone for me to just get out of here. I mean, seriously, dude. I don’t belong here. I’m not a spoiled rich kid aiming to get into some fancy college I’m just trying to escape my own miserable life Seriously, I stand out like a sore thumb around here. I think it might be easier for me just to drop out.” I shrugged.

Thomas gaped at me. “Can you at least give it a few days? Think it over.”

I nodded. “I’ll think about it.”

I moved past Thomas and went into my room. I plopped down on my bed with a sigh. I glanced at my guitar, sitting on its stand. I hadn’t played it once since I’d been here. Before I came here, I was writing songs and playing them every day.

Since I’d been here I’d been studying or out with Olivia, and I’d just been too busy to do anything.

I sighed and got up, crossing the room. I picked up my guitar and placed it inside its case.

I closed it, fastening the buckles.

I glanced around the room. I had very few things here that were actually mine.

I made up my mind immediately. I grabbed my huge duffle bag from the top shelf in my closet. I threw it on my bed and began shoving my own clothes inside it. I grabbed my journals out of my desk and shoved them inside too. I grabbed the laptop from my computerassuming at the very least that if I could make it out of this place with it, I could pawn it for enough cash to live on for a while.

Once I’d gathered everything, I threw my duffle bag back in the closet.

I’d made up my mind. I would skip classes tomorrow and hitch hike into town. Once I got to town, hopefully there would be a bus or train to get me far, far away from this place.

I changed into my boxers and climbed into bed. I hadn’t washed my sheets since Olivia had slept over. My sheets still smelled deliciously of her perfume, and my pillows were strongly scented with the smell of her shampoo, it was like lying next to her. It made me miss her like crazy.

I’d never been hung up on a girl. Never. I’d had girls hung up on me plenty of times, but not the other way around.

I couldn’t understand how I could miss her so much when it had only been a couple of days.

I didn’t like leaving Thomas either. He was really my only friend in this place, and I was his only friend. He had the kids in the chess club, but I was his only friend who didn’t warrant him getting his ass kicked.

I was sure that once I left, Thomas was probably going to face a ton of backlash from the guys I’d beaten the shit out of.

Maybe I could talk Thomas into going with me. I was sure I could use his brain somewhere along this adventure.

But Thomas had a bright future ahead of him. He could be a doctor or lawyer or an expert surgeon or something. He needed to be in this school, and get his degree and get into a good college.

I sighed and flopped over. Tomorrow, I was getting out of here.